Decisions

Tuesday, 9 July 2013

Decisions

I make decisions for the boys all the time. What they will wear, eat, places to go. I don't normally have a problem with this. Today I do. Today I have had to make the decision as to whether big man continues with gymnastics or not. He doesn't really know what he wants to do. One minute he wants to do rugby, then football, then back to gymnastics. At over £120 for next term, I am reluctant to say the least about forking out the money, when in a months time he is likely to decide that he doesn't want to do it. Reading Suzanne's post about extra cirricular activities has got me thinking.

Without a doubt, when big man was a baby, I joined a variety of groups for my own sanity. These continued, I had more babies and there were more classes. At the beginning of the this year we were paying out for 3 children to swim, two to do a pre school music class, one after school rugby, one gymnastics class and 2 football classes. It was a lot of money and a lot of time. Family time at weekends was cut down by football and swimming and something needed to change.

I know that big man wont be the next Olympic gymnast. I know this as I sat talking to one on a train back from the Olympics last year and they are in an elite club at the age of 3. I know that given a few weeks he will be happy in football or rugby. I know that I will be much happier. I have never enjoyed going and on the basis that at the receptionists window there is a notice saying that no verbal abuse is tolerated, I hope you can see why. I know that if he continues with gymnastics, it will get to a point where they want him to go more than once a week. Taking 2 small children into hot a packed room that smells of feet and expecting them to sit still for 45 mins whilst big man does his class is ridiculous.

So why do I feel so guilty? Of that I am not sure. I am not prepared to spend my entire time ferrying the kids from one club to another at such a young age. Do lots of after school activities make a happier child? I don't think so. Swimming lessons are not negotiable and the boys have been told that these will continue until they can swim properly. I'm not sure what I mean by properly, but I am pretty sure that I continued until I could swim 50m. To me it is a life skill and that is why it must continue. To be honest, our holiday could have ended horrifically if middle man had never had swimming lessons. For now, at the ages of 5 and under I think it is acceptable to say they can each do one other class.

So the decision has been made. No more gymnastics. He can chose to play football or rugby after school where not only do I not have to take the younger boys, but he has the added advantage of playing with his peers. I think it is the right decision, but I still feel bad about it.


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9 comments:

Mummy of Two said...

You can't do everything can you! I'm sure he'll love rugby and football more as he gets older. We keep meaning to get our son into something but it's hard to find the time and extra money for all that is needed!

Alison said...

It is so hard to make these decisions but I am sure its the right one. He will love rugby and football

Older Mum said...

You can't be a whirlwind taxi ferrying back wards and forwards from clubs all the time! I'm with you. The only lessons I had when I was a child were swimming lessons - a skill everyone needs!

Jaime Oliver said...

awww honey i think now matter what decision we make as parents we always beat ourselves up about it! for what its worth i would of made that decision too :-)

Louise said...

Totally with you on such decisions! It definitely sounds like you made the right one xxx

Lorraine (Gin & Cornflakes) said...

I have all this to come! I think you made the right one tho defo! I had to walk pretty much everywhere when I was little... Although when I was older I was ferried to hockey matches here there and everywhere. I'll do the same for LO, within reason, but there has to be a limit :)
Popping over from PoCoLo and am so pleased to have found a post that is an honest account of these issues - dreading it :) x

Tas D said...

I can understand what you're saying - especially when you can use that money elsewhere and on more fun things. Rather than remembering smelly feet all the time I mean. I can't believe they have elite clubs for 3 year olds. Blimey!!

SarahMummy said...

It's tough making these decisions, but it sounds like there's a lot of reasons for it. Totally get where you are coming from with keeping kids entertained in a waiting room - I had my two boys in the hot, stuffy room at ballet where they just went crazy and embarrassed me in front of all the private school mums who don't have boys (or certainly don't have more than one). When he's older if he decides to go back to gymnastics he still can and it will be his decision!

Tori Wel said...

I have to say I feel exactly the same way. At the moment I am trying to decide what activity to give Grace next and I want to make sure it is the right one due to the finances it involves and whether it will be a long term thing! Not easy to decide on this. Thanks for linking to PoCoLo - and glad I'm not the only one xx